Holidays can be an incredibly stressful time. Studies over the last 10 years show an estimated 69-80% of folks endorse heightened stress during this season. Add on a pandemic and wowee we need to be prepared!
We may not be able to avoid stress entirely but we can certainly do small things to mitigate the intensity and impact of stress.
Below I’ve listed a few of what I see as essentials for maintaining low stress levels this holiday season. I’ve organized these 6 essentials into “The ABCs of holiday coping”. Enjoy!
A - Assess your needs and boundaries — Spend 5-10 minutes with yourself identifying what you need to accomplish, what you need from loved ones, and where your limits are. Does the family need to set limits on dinner table conversation? Do you need help with gift shopping? Consider communicating these needs/boundaries early before the holiday stress hits so it delegates emotional responsibility off your plate. I like to write out my needs/boundaries every few months so that I have clear objectives to work toward.
B - Budget — I can’t emphasize this enough for managing holiday stress. Often folks overspend and by the end of the year they are feeling the stress of those credit card bills or late bills. Budget your presents, feasts, and travels. Budgeting is simply taking the money you have in income, designating it to bills (e.g., mortgage, electricity), debts (e.g., medical bills, loans, credit cards), and essentials (e.g., gas, groceries, entertainment), and then designating where to put the remaining (e.g., savings, buy a new blouse, gifts). You can find helpful budgeting tools all over the internet. But even if you don’t find a worksheet you like, simply calculate the following:
(Monthly Income + Savings) - Bills - Debts - essentials = Remaining cash for gifts or other goals.
C - Create a Pandemic plan — with 150,000 new cases everyday (and rising) it’s important to celebrate in the safest and most comfortable way for all. Some local officials are encouraging folks to cancel their plans or keep it to immediate family only. This may be a good option if numbers are on the rise in your area. But if you do decide to get together 1) take safety precautions (e.g., 6 feet apart, wear masks, don’t share food), 2) set limits (e.g., no hugging, outside only), and 3) communicate the value of everyone’s safe connection (e.g., make disclaimers if your uncomfortable, encourage others to engage in safe behaviors). Holidays are about love and connection. We can do those things safely in this pandemic even if it’s via zoom.
D - Don’t do it all — raise your hand if you’re like me and try to decorate, gift shop, bake, and plan all the things on your own? Don’t do it. This year is stressful enough and no commercial holiday is worth your health and well-being. If you do want it all, ask for help. Or see where you can make short cuts or compromises. How can we successfully connect with others if we’re so strung out on stress?
E- Eat intuitively — listen to your body: what is it craving, what does it need, when are you full? Listen and respond. Bingeing on holiday treats is common when we deprive ourselves of our cravings leading up to big holiday feasts. Choose not to partake in the mental gymnastics of diet culture. Allow yourself to let go of the pressure. You are worthy of living with ease and with a healthy relationship with food this holiday season.
F- Find time to rest — this is maybe the most important. Commercial holidays have the tendency to be both enjoyable and cheery while somehow sucking the life energy out of us. Replenish your energy often. Get the recommended 7-8 of sleep at night. Take naps on your days off. Plan a day to do nothing. Have a designated space in your home just to yourself and spend 30 minutes each day soaking up the calm when you can. Rest is vital to our health. Prioritize it!
If you’re finding yourself continue to struggle with anxiety or depression despite your coping strategies, reach out to a helping professional today. I am currently accepting new clients for 2021.
Happy holidays and stay safe!
